A few thoughts on having COVID-19: I had a mild case, but it was no fun

One fine day a few weeks ago, I worked from home like normal, went for a jog, worked out in the yard and then test positive for COVID-19.

It was quite a day.

The day before I tested positive, I had a little cough. It was spring, though, and it is normal to cough in the spring. I didn’t think anything of it. I had already received my first COVID-19 vaccine shot and was feeling pretty confident. Also, my hair was looking perfect that day.

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Paper towels: Terrible at math, but terrific at cleaning up messes and playing music

Paper towels have evolved past the point of my comprehension.

Paper towel math makes no sense, the types of sheets are too complex and I’m still not positive if I can use them in the microwave or not.

The only thing I know for sure, in fact, is that I can turn paper towels into desktop speakers.

In order to wipe away the confusion surrounding this controversial topic, I absorbed as much paper towel information as possible, and I am proud to share my bounty of findings here with you today. And yes, this includes information on turning your paper towels into desktop speakers.

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A cold morning can warm your heart

On Saturday, I did something I really didn’t want to do.

And wouldn’t you know it, the whole thing turned out great. My intuition never fails to be wrong.

The event was to help a group that was handing out food boxes. I don’t volunteer to help with anything nearly enough, but every time I have helped with a food drive before I have enjoyed it.

This week, though, it was very cold and I had been busy all week with work. The last thing I wanted to do on a Saturday was to go stand outside in the cold.

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No electricity, no problem!

The power went out in my town recently, and I found the whole experience to be rather interesting, enlightening and cold.

When the power first went out, I did the only sensible thing I could do, which was to stare at my computer for a few minutes while I tried to figure out what was going on. Did my computer break? Was my work saved? Is this somehow my fault?

My wife and I are both currently working from home, so we were able to determine that the power went out in the house. Then we learned it was out all across the city. It was concerning to hear the power outage was so widespread, but a relief to know that I most likely would not be blamed.

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A few logical reasons for not writing enough

Well, I don’t know about you, but my New Year’s resolution for writing more hasn’t worked out very well so far.

It has been a busy few months and I am way behind on writing. Thankfully, I have plenty of great reasons for why I have been so quiet lately.

With that in mind, here are my perfectly reasonable reasons for being so far behind on writing:

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Swab, swagger and other swanky “swa” words

While getting a COVID-19 test recently, I started thinking about what a weird word “swab” is.

Say it out loud a few times.

Swab. Swab. Swab.

It doesn’t even seem like an actual word.

Swab.

It is, though, and when you take a stab at examining swab, you’ll see that there are more “swa” words than you thought possible

So, here is some information for you on swab and several other “swa” words.

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How much weight did I gain during this election? We won’t know until all of the pounds are counted

This election has been stressful, meaningful and full-full.

I have eaten a lot!

But exactly how much weight have I gained? In order to find out, I talked to the election analysts on television who broke it all down for me. Here is what they had to say:

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Don’t believe the lyes! A few important questions about liquid hand soaps

Like many people, I enjoy washing my hands.

Although to be clear, I don’t believe that most other people like washing my hands, they generally prefer to wash their own.

And in 2020, I have been washing my hands even more than usual. All of this hand washing, though, has caused plenty of hand wringing due to the handful of important issues involving liquid hand soap in the world today. 

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The price of progress

Innovation can be awfully expensive.

Now, I realize there are a few good things about progress, but do you ever stop and think about how much we pay for items that used to be much less expensive or didn’t even exist at all?

I was pondering progress while studying the regress in my checking account today and came up with a few items to complain about, I mean to discuss with you:

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