I am a lot like Jeff Bezos

Jeff Bezos and I have a lot in common.

Bezos is the billionaire founder of Amazon who is known as the world’s richest man. In addition, he will be traveling into space this summer, and he is recognized for and wide for his amazing accomplishments.

So, as you can see, we are very similar.

Frankly, it’s a little eerie, and I am starting to wonder if we are somehow related. I will explain it here with these examples that show how we seem to be living pretty much the same life:

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A city in Georgia is building a giant chicken, but I don’t know if the idea will ever get off the ground

A city in Georgia is building a giant chicken in order to attract tourists.

Yes, you read the correctly.

I had to read the news story twice the other day when I first saw it.

According to this Associated Press article, the city of Fitzgerald, Georgia is building chicken that stands 62 feet tall. The giant chicken will also have plants growing out of its frame, so that it can be some sort of living chicken sculpture.

The city leaders believe that by spending so much money in this giant chicken plant, they will bring attention to their city, increase tourism and help the city with its economic development.

While it sounds like an amazing idea, I do have a few thoughts and questions about it:

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Miss Understanding, Sir Charge and other unfortunate pageant titles

It is always impressive when someone is honored with a title such as Miss America, Mr. Universe or Sir Something-Or-Other.

But those titles always make me think of other contests that would be an honor to win, but might also be confusing. Here are a few examples:

Miss Demeanor – The pageant winner who is pleasant and whose crimes aren’t too serious.

Sir Round – He’s everywhere!

Miss Print – Is this correct? Is this a Miss Print?

Sir Lee– The winner of the most unfriendly contest.

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A few thoughts on having COVID-19: I had a mild case, but it was no fun

One fine day a few weeks ago, I worked from home like normal, went for a jog, worked out in the yard and then tested positive for COVID-19.

It was quite a day.

The day before I tested positive, I had a little cough. It was spring, though, and it is normal to cough in the spring. I didn’t think anything of it. I had already received my first COVID-19 vaccine shot and was feeling pretty confident. Also, my hair was looking perfect that day.

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Paper towels: Terrible at math, but terrific at cleaning up messes and playing music

Paper towels have evolved past the point of my comprehension.

Paper towel math makes no sense, the types of sheets are too complex and I’m still not positive if I can use them in the microwave or not.

The only thing I know for sure, in fact, is that I can turn paper towels into desktop speakers.

In order to wipe away the confusion surrounding this controversial topic, I absorbed as much paper towel information as possible, and I am proud to share my bounty of findings here with you today. And yes, this includes information on turning your paper towels into desktop speakers.

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How much weight did I gain during this election? We won’t know until all of the pounds are counted

This election has been stressful, meaningful and full-full.

I have eaten a lot!

But exactly how much weight have I gained? In order to find out, I talked to the election analysts on television who broke it all down for me. Here is what they had to say:

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Don’t believe the lyes! A few important questions about liquid hand soaps

Like many people, I enjoy washing my hands.

Although to be clear, I don’t believe that most other people like washing my hands, they generally prefer to wash their own.

And in 2020, I have been washing my hands even more than usual. All of this hand washing, though, has caused plenty of hand wringing due to the handful of important issues involving liquid hand soap in the world today. 

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The price of progress

Innovation can be awfully expensive.

Now, I realize there are a few good things about progress, but do you ever stop and think about how much we pay for items that used to be much less expensive or didn’t even exist at all?

I was pondering progress while studying the regress in my checking account today and came up with a few items to complain about, I mean to discuss with you:

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