While staying at home with a kidney stone, you have plenty of time to think.
So while having a kidney stone problem recently was no fun at all, I thought it would be fun to share with you a few things that go through your mind when you have a kidney stone.
- I wonder how long this will last? It will probably be done later today 😊 (Note: It may be done in a day or two for many people, but it was much longer for me. ☹)
- I always heard that passing a kidney stone is bad. I wonder if the actual passing of it will be the worst part? (Note, it was definitely not the worst part, not by a long shot. It didn’t feel good, but the pain when it was moving or not moving around was much worse.)
- Maybe if I lie on my right side, it will feel better.
- Maybe if I lie on my left side, it will feel better.
- Maybe if I like on my back, but also put a pillow under me so that I lean to the left it will feel better.
- Maybe if I tell God I will become a minister it will feel better.
- Why didn’t I drink more water before on every day of my life?
- How can they want me to drink more water now or all of these other drinks? I can’t drink anything else.
- I just got comfortable and now I have to pee again. Will it hurt or make me feel better?
- I used to like Blue Powerade, and now it seems terrible. I don’t even like the smell of it.
- Doughnuts smell awful now, too.
- I must be very sick. I love doughnuts. Curse this kidney stone!!!!
- I am never eating kidney beans again!
- I guess I will drink more water again.
- I guess I will pee again, too.
- Is the pain moving? Maybe it’s coming out!
- It did not come out.
- My brother Marty had a kidney stone earlier this year. He was telling me about his a few weeks ago and it sounded terrible. I bet he gave me this one! I didn’t know he was contagious. Stupid brother.
- Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to lie down on my left side? Some people can just do that whenever they want. I will never take that for granted again.
- If this is supposed to be the closest a man can come to feel what it is like to have a baby, then why don’t people give me gifts? You could call it a Kidney Stone Shower.
- I rarely take baths, but baths are amazing if you have a kidney stone. The pain decreases, you get to relax and it is awesome. If you have a kidney stone, I strongly recommend taking baths.
- Maybe at a Kidney Stone Shower they could give me gifts of bath soaps and toys. I would like to have a toy boat to play with in here.
- I have been told that drinking beer will help me. I am drinking beer. I like this prescription.
- They could also give you gifts of beer at the Kidney Stone Shower.
- I am not drinking olive oil. It sounds terrible.
- Speaking of drinking, I should go pee again.
- Remember when I used to exercise?
- Remember when I didn’t have to pee into this stupid little straining cup?
- Remember when I used to leave the house?
- I have no desire to go anywhere.
- Scratch that, I do want to go to the bathroom again.
- I hope they remember me at work when I am better.
- If I go to work and it hurts again, will they mind if I lie down under my desk?
- It’s not like I don’t already do that on some afternoons when I have “meetings.”
- The hospital procedure sounds uncomfortable, but it has got to be better than this. I just want this stupid thing to get out.
- I can’t wait to go to the hospital so they can stick some laser thing up inside of me!
- Hospitals are cold. Why are they so cold?
- What exactly is this doctor going to do to me again? How is that laser getting in there? How much pain medicine will you give me?
- I don’t feel very sleepy yet. When will this start to…zzzzzzzz
- Is it over? Where am I? Who is this guy? How did I get back in my bed?
- Should I drink more water and beer? Can I pee again or is that going to hurt? (Note: It did hurt, but went away eventually).
- I am so glad it is over!
- I am so glad it doesn’t hurt anymore!
- I’m so glad I don’t have to pee in the stupid straining cup anymore.
- I feel so free!
- I am going to lie down now and just switch sides whenever I want!! Life is good.
- And as long as I drink a lot of water and change my diet a little from now on, life should be great.
So glad you’ve recovered! Now, go drink a beer, eat a doughnut, take a bath and lie down on your left side under your desk.
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Thanks! That is great advice!
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Thank you for that extremely detailed play by play. I think a kidney stone shower is a wonderful idea…. though I’m not sure how you’d decorate for it. Pink streamered urinals?
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Thanks, and I think pink streamered urinals is a great idea! It will be the party of the year.
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Although it might mess with your aim… and no one wants that party favor.
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No donuts? I don’t want to live in a world like that. I’m glad that’s over but not as glad as you. I applaud your ability to find the humor in even the most unpleasant things. Now go have a drink of water.
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Thanks Kenny. I could not believe that doughnuts smelled bad to me. I’m glad I like them again now, and I am about to drink more water. Thanks again!
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Glad you’ve passed it now. All the pain and not feeling very well I mean, not passed the stone…although maybe you did a bit… anyway, all good now I hope.
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Thanks, and good to hear from you my friend. All good now, and I hope you are doing well, too.
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