Passing time while waiting in the airport

I spent several hours in the airport the other night waiting to pick up family members whose flight was delayed.

While there, I was able to ponder several important questions, such as:

  • Why do they have so many uncomfortable chairs here?
  • Why are escalators so much fun?
  • How much longer is this going to be?
  • Are some people really doing their Christmas shopping here?
  • Are the clocks even moving right now? What can I do to waste some time?

In order to waste time, I came up with some deep and insightful thoughts to share with you here about these important subjects:

The chairs

Airports have so many different types of chairs, but most of them are really not very comfortable when you have to sit in them for a long time. Many of them have stiff arm rests that get in the way, some are too hard, and some are just weird.

I should add that some are decent for relaxing or even sleeping, but for a place that is designed for people to wait around, most of the chairs really aren’t very comfortable.

What even is this chair? I couldn’t figure out how to sit on it.

The moving stairs and sidewalks

I don’t understand why anyone does not take the moving sidewalks at the airport. They are faster, fun and they make me feel important. I can’t be bothered with walking on the normal ground, I need the ground to move me!

It’s always disappointing, too, when you get off of the moving sidewalk and have to walk on the regular ground. Sigh, I guess I can have to walk like a regular person again. I think more places should have moving sidewalks.

Wouldn’t they be great at the grocery store for when you want to get your shopping done quickly? It would help you move through the store, and it would get slow moving shoppers out of the way.

Escalators are also fun. It’s fun to ride on stairs and look around at other people while you try to act like you are not looking at them.

Look I’m in a garden.

Things to do for fun

The airport I was waiting in had a lot of art in one hallway, so I took photos of myself in the artworks to see if I could look like I was in them.

I also was able to take photos of myself in other places in the airport just to try to look like I was in different situations.

Shopping

Now I’m in the water!

Are you crazy! Have you seen the prices in the airport? I will buy a snack or something to read, but who is buying all of these other items? Some stores were suggesting people do their Christmas shopping there. I get that you have time to waste so you may want to shop, but who can afford to buy anything there?

If I had that much money, I would have just bought my own airplane so that I wouldn’t have to wait around in the airport all day.

People watching

This is great for passing the time, unless most of the people around you are sleeping. You can still make up stories in your head about the people you see, though.

One guy sleeping in one spot near me, for example, was definitely a former spy who now works as a llama farmer. One person was waiting for a long-lost sister, and another was an airport chair salesperson.

Writing a column

It may not be the best column ever written, but at least it was a good way to pass the time. Thanks for your help!

I did a lot of thinking!

Adventures in moving a sofa!

My wife and I recently bought a new sofa.

While I know this sounds fun and glamourous, it actually created much more work than I expected.

Our old sofa had served us well for many years. It was great for watching television, napping, serving as a bed when family members stayed at the house, acting as jumping pad for grandchildren and even taking on the role of a scratching post for our cat. That last part was frowned upon by my wife and me, but the cat had grown quite fond of it.

Our feline friend also enjoyed leaving her extra hair on the sofa, as well as knocking small items underneath it.

Continue reading “Adventures in moving a sofa!”

I am a lot like Jeff Bezos

Jeff Bezos and I have a lot in common.

Bezos is the billionaire founder of Amazon who is known as the world’s richest man. In addition, he will be traveling into space this summer, and he is recognized for and wide for his amazing accomplishments.

So, as you can see, we are very similar.

Frankly, it’s a little eerie, and I am starting to wonder if we are somehow related. I will explain it here with these examples that show how we seem to be living pretty much the same life:

Continue reading “I am a lot like Jeff Bezos”

A city in Georgia is building a giant chicken, but I don’t know if the idea will ever get off the ground

A city in Georgia is building a giant chicken in order to attract tourists.

Yes, you read the correctly.

I had to read the news story twice the other day when I first saw it.

According to this Associated Press article, the city of Fitzgerald, Georgia is building chicken that stands 62 feet tall. The giant chicken will also have plants growing out of its frame, so that it can be some sort of living chicken sculpture.

The city leaders believe that by spending so much money in this giant chicken plant, they will bring attention to their city, increase tourism and help the city with its economic development.

While it sounds like an amazing idea, I do have a few thoughts and questions about it:

Continue reading “A city in Georgia is building a giant chicken, but I don’t know if the idea will ever get off the ground”

Miss Understanding, Sir Charge and other unfortunate pageant titles

It is always impressive when someone is honored with a title such as Miss America, Mr. Universe or Sir Something-Or-Other.

But those titles always make me think of other contests that would be an honor to win, but might also be confusing. Here are a few examples:

Miss Demeanor – The pageant winner who is pleasant and whose crimes aren’t too serious.

Sir Round – He’s everywhere!

Miss Print – Is this correct? Is this a Miss Print?

Sir Lee– The winner of the most unfriendly contest.

Continue reading “Miss Understanding, Sir Charge and other unfortunate pageant titles”

A few thoughts on having COVID-19: I had a mild case, but it was no fun

One fine day a few weeks ago, I worked from home like normal, went for a jog, worked out in the yard and then tested positive for COVID-19.

It was quite a day.

The day before I tested positive, I had a little cough. It was spring, though, and it is normal to cough in the spring. I didn’t think anything of it. I had already received my first COVID-19 vaccine shot and was feeling pretty confident. Also, my hair was looking perfect that day.

Continue reading “A few thoughts on having COVID-19: I had a mild case, but it was no fun”

Paper towels: Terrible at math, but terrific at cleaning up messes and playing music

Paper towels have evolved past the point of my comprehension.

Paper towel math makes no sense, the types of sheets are too complex and I’m still not positive if I can use them in the microwave or not.

The only thing I know for sure, in fact, is that I can turn paper towels into desktop speakers.

In order to wipe away the confusion surrounding this controversial topic, I absorbed as much paper towel information as possible, and I am proud to share my bounty of findings here with you today. And yes, this includes information on turning your paper towels into desktop speakers.

Continue reading “Paper towels: Terrible at math, but terrific at cleaning up messes and playing music”

Why don’t washing machines dry clothes? How did we get so many lids? And other important thoughts

Why can’t a clothes washer and a dryer be combined into the same device? Dishwashers clean and dry the dishes. Why can’t we do this with clothes, too?

While working from home recently, I’ve had extra time to focus on important questions and thoughts such as these, so I thought I should share a few of them here with you today. You are welcome. Continue reading “Why don’t washing machines dry clothes? How did we get so many lids? And other important thoughts”