These days, I often see people sitting.
I don’t know how it has come down to this, but more and more people are often inclined to be reclined.
Sitting has always been a part of our lives, but experts and armchair quarterbacks agree that it has become more popular due to advances in sitting technology. In order to examine these advances and to assist you with your sitting, our judges have set before you the Top 5 Chairs.
First a few honorable mentions:
Those round net chairs and/or egg shaped chairs – They are surprisingly comfortable, but impossible to get out of. Trying to get out of a comfortable round chair is a good way to hurt your back.
Dinner table chairs – Great for eating dinner, but really only comfortable for like 10 minutes unless you are allowed to balance them on their back two legs. This national campaign against leaning back on chairs needs to be ended! Until then, dinner table chairs will remain out of the Top 5.
Bean bag chairs – When I was younger, I loved bean bag chairs and would happily sit in them. As an adult, though, I just can’t quite understand how anyone gets comfortable in one of them. They are also quite difficult to get out of, and the beans tend to make a mess when they become unbagged. My stepdaughter argues that bean bag chairs would be better if they were higher up.
Dentist’s chairs – Incredibly comfortable and they have the handy water fountains and spit sinks close by. I would like to have one in my living room. If it weren’t for the bright lights and dentists that too often come with these chairs, they would definitely be in the Top 5.
Toilets – This is a tough one. Is a toilet a chair? It has a seat and a back and people definitely sit on them and feel relaxed. Sometimes, there is no place you would rather be than when you’re in a bathroom and on a toilet. Alas, I can’t get behind the idea that it is a chair. I know people may refer to a toilet as a stool or throne, but No. 1, I don’t think a stool is a chair and No. 2, I don’t think a toilet qualifies as a throne. There may be a great movement to refer to toilets as chairs, but I will try to stay out of the argument from here on out, as just thinking about it now I can feel my face is flushed.
5. Folding chairs – They may not be the most comfortable chairs, but they make up for that with sheer convenience. They can be stacked, carried, stored in closets or even used as weapons in professional wrestling matches. My cousin John at one time moved into an apartment and only had one chair, a folding chair that he borrowed from my grandmother until he finally was able to get some additional furniture. That chair was a great start for him, and folding chairs are an underrated invention.
4. Pool chairs – Is there anything better than sitting by the pool or at the beach in a comfortable chair? That’s living right there. Some chairs may be more comfortable, but the utility of these chairs (you can sit in them wet or dry, you can get sand all over them and they often can hold drinks) pushes them to a solid No. 4 position. The only thing that keeps them from climbing higher in the standings is the realization of how many other people who were wet, sweaty or sand-filled sat on the chairs before you.
3. Office chairs – They swivel and lean, they have wheels and they can make work fun. It’s great to lean back in an office chair, pull your glasses off of your face, look seriously at a co-worker and say something like, “We’re going to have to drill down through all of this siloing and examine our best practices and results driven initiatives in order to circle back to the value added bench marks that are our bottom line.” Also, if you are a bad guy in a movie, you always want to be in an office chair with your face looking out of a window when the good guy arrives, and then you spin around and say to the good guy something like, “I was wondering when you would finally catch on.”
2. Rocking chairs – A surprising choice at No. 2, rocking chairs are much more comfortable than you might remember. The fact that they can be used to help children fall aleep, or that they can be fun to rock in just adds to the joy of sitting. Today, there are countless types of rocking chairs and I am always amazed at how much I like them and how difficult it is to not rock back and forth as soon as you sit down. Also, if you are rocking in a chair, you can argue that you are exercising while sitting. Finally, they have the name of “rocking,” so they just sound cool.
1. Recliners – The No. 1 chair in our countdown is no surprise because a reclining chair is incredibly comfortable. Plus, it has the advantages of many other chairs. For example, many recliners can rock like rocking chairs, some can spin like office chairs, they can all lean back, they more comfortable then dentist’s chair, they are fairly easy to get out of (except for the fact that you don’t want to get out of them), they are somewhat foldable and they are even easy to sleep in. They are not very portable and are rarely used at the beach, but our judges say that we should all sit down and cheer for the recliner chair.