A few words in support of procrastination

Too often people talk about procrastinating as if it’s a bad thing.

Sure, there are good aspects to finishing projects quickly, but there are also numerous positives related to delaying your work.

Often when I am supposed to be doing something like completing a work project, cleaning the living room or tying my shoes, I get interrupted by important thoughts that must be pondered. I see this as a positive example of prioritizing.

Here are a few of these important thoughts:

• I’m too hungry to really focus on this project at this time. It would be better for me, and really for everyone, if I got something to eat first.
• Am I doing this the right way? Maybe I should think about this for a few minutes to see if there is a better way of attacking this shoe tying or other problem.
• Did my phone just buzz? I’d better check it.
• What if I can’t focus on this right now because I am a genius? Maybe my mind should be worrying about different projects. I can’t be bothered with items like writing reports or figuring out if the dishes in the dishwasher are currently clean or dirty!
• If the word “procrastination” has “pro” in it, doesn’t that make it a positive? Most words with “pro” are good words. Why is everyone so anti-procrastination?
• I am definitely pro-procrastination.
• If they can make peanut butter, can they also make peanut milk or peanut cheese?
• I need to get up in 20 minutes. I won’t get much done before then. I’d be better off waiting until I am back before I really get started on this.
• Will this project really matter 50 years from now?
• I’m too full now to focus on this project. It would be better for me, and for everyone, if I let my food settle.
• I’d like to say that I am hesitating, prolonging or protracting this project instead of procrastinating.
• Maybe if I think about something else for a while and take my mind off of this project, that will allow me to think about this in a new manner and come up with the correct solution. For now, I’ll be more productive if I go back to scrolling social media and looking up videos.
• I need to use my Executive Time right now.
• I am too tired to focus on this. I need to get some caffeine or a nap.
• You know how in disaster movies, the characters are always too focused on the daily problems of life until the disaster hits? Then, after there has been a terrible earthquake, alien invasion or some other problem, the characters realize that they shouldn’t worry about the daily problems of life, and that family and friends are more important? Maybe I am realizing that right now, but without a whole disaster befalling the world. You are welcome.
• Yes, I did look up synonyms for procrastinating earlier. You might say that I was temporizing until I could decide how to move forward with this column.
• Am I sick? Does my head hurt? Maybe I should go lie down. That’s probably why I can’t focus. I am kind of a hero for getting this far in my condition.
• I need to get up and walk around and get some fresh air.
• I’m too tired and cold from walking around. I need to rest and warm up before I can work effectively.
• What if there is some peanut butter in my teeth and someone comes up to talk to me? I’d better go check my teeth before I get back to work on this.
• Did my phone buzz again? It’s not even in my pocket. Where is it? And why did it feel like my pocket was buzzing?
• Is that a sign of a heart attack?
• Rats, I ran out of time to finish this once again. I was just starting to make some great progress, too. I bet that I will get this finished quickly next time.
• Wait a minute! I actually was writing a column about procrastinating and now I am somehow finished. How did that happen? Maybe I really am a genius.