Congress needs to act to eliminate scented trash bags!

While government leaders discuss impeachment, interest rates and energy policy, I still keep accidentally purchasing “scented” trash bags at the grocery store!

Something definitely needs to be done about this, and I hope that Congress, the United Nations or the Avengers can do something soon about this ill-smelling injustice. This fragrant fraud must be stopped before it stinks again!

Why were scented trash bags invented and distributed? Is this another example of a foreign country trying to disrupt our way of life? Elections are one thing, but when they mess with my trash can, that’s where I draw the line!

Here are a few of the problems I have with scented trash bags:

• They smell terrible! – Why is the odor so strong? When you put one in a trash can, you end up with a room of aroma that smells awful!
• I don’t want my trash to smell like “April mist” or “Cranwatermelon” unless it is filled with mist, cranberries or watermelon. – I just want it to smell like regular trash.
• They don’t help – The scent doesn’t cover the smell of trash, it just combines with it to make a worse smell. I don’t want to have the combination smell of regular trash and “Blueberry Pirate.” It just makes it smell worse.
• The packaging now makes it hard to distinguish between scented and unscented trash bags –I don’t want to spend that much time looking at all of the trash bags in the store to examine the smells. I just want to buy regular trash bags.
• They actually create more trash! – Whenever I accidentally purchase them, we usually end up throwing them away after the first bag or two stinks up the kitchen.

While the scented trash bags are bad, I have also discovered that the problem is getting worse.

For example, I have accidentally bought scented cat littler bags in the past, and they were also terrible. I also don’t like scented cat litter, as it does not at all smell like “Purple Pinecone” or whatever the different fragrances are. It just stinks worse than the cat litter box usually smells.

When will this madness stop? What’s next?

• Will we soon have scented shoes? – Worried about your feet smelling like feet? Well, worry no more! Now, when you walk into a room people will say, “Wow, something reminds me of Coconut Cauliflower!”
• What about scented lights? – Want to make your room smell better? Well now, we are able to distribute terrible fragrances through your lights!
• Scented pets?– Gee, your hare smells terrific!
• How about scented cents? – Lemon-fresh quarters!
• And of course, scented sentences – It costs a little more to set up your blog for this, but you would be surprised at how many more readers you can get if some of your paragraphs and sentences smell like “Vanilla Rain!”

As you can see, the problem with scented products is terrible, so you can understand why I am so incensed! My nose knows no scented trash bags that smell nice. They all smell terrible and I can’t comprehend why anyone would want them.

So please, I encourage you to write to your political leaders and tell them that it’s time to trash aromatic trash bags. If they don’t agree, we will accuse them of being corporate smell-outs and show them to the odor at the next election!

Together, we will raise a stink and have our voices heard! It’s time to eliminate the stench of stinky trash bags. It just makes scents!