Tag: stupid humor

A city in Georgia is building a giant chicken, but I don’t know if the idea will ever get off the ground

~ nickc324 ~ 6 Comments

A city in Georgia is building a giant chicken in order to attract tourists.

Yes, you read the correctly.

I had to read the news story twice the other day when I first saw it.

According to this Associated Press article, the city of Fitzgerald, Georgia is building chicken that stands 62 feet tall. The giant chicken will also have plants growing out of its frame, so that it can be some sort of living chicken sculpture.

The city leaders believe that by spending so much money in this giant chicken plant, they will bring attention to their city, increase tourism and help the city with its economic development.

While it sounds like an amazing idea, I do have a few thoughts and questions about it:

Continue reading “A city in Georgia is building a giant chicken, but I don’t know if the idea will ever get off the ground” →

Miss Understanding, Sir Charge and other unfortunate pageant titles

~ nickc324 ~ 8 Comments

It is always impressive when someone is honored with a title such as Miss America, Mr. Universe or Sir Something-Or-Other.

But those titles always make me think of other contests that would be an honor to win, but might also be confusing. Here are a few examples:

Miss Demeanor – The pageant winner who is pleasant and whose crimes aren’t too serious.

Sir Round – He’s everywhere!

Miss Print – Is this correct? Is this a Miss Print?

Sir Lee– The winner of the most unfriendly contest.

Continue reading “Miss Understanding, Sir Charge and other unfortunate pageant titles” →

Paper towels: Terrible at math, but terrific at cleaning up messes and playing music

~ nickc324 ~ 7 Comments

Paper towels have evolved past the point of my comprehension.

Paper towel math makes no sense, the types of sheets are too complex and I’m still not positive if I can use them in the microwave or not.

The only thing I know for sure, in fact, is that I can turn paper towels into desktop speakers.

In order to wipe away the confusion surrounding this controversial topic, I absorbed as much paper towel information as possible, and I am proud to share my bounty of findings here with you today. And yes, this includes information on turning your paper towels into desktop speakers.

Continue reading “Paper towels: Terrible at math, but terrific at cleaning up messes and playing music” →

How much weight did I gain during this election? We won’t know until all of the pounds are counted

~ nickc324 ~ 10 Comments

This election has been stressful, meaningful and full-full.

I have eaten a lot!

But exactly how much weight have I gained? In order to find out, I talked to the election analysts on television who broke it all down for me. Here is what they had to say:

Continue reading “How much weight did I gain during this election? We won’t know until all of the pounds are counted” →

Don’t believe the lyes! A few important questions about liquid hand soaps

~ nickc324 ~ 14 Comments

Like many people, I enjoy washing my hands.

Although to be clear, I don’t believe that most other people like washing my hands, they generally prefer to wash their own.

And in 2020, I have been washing my hands even more than usual. All of this hand washing, though, has caused plenty of hand wringing due to the handful of important issues involving liquid hand soap in the world today. 

Continue reading “Don’t believe the lyes! A few important questions about liquid hand soaps” →

Happy New Fiscal Year!

~ nickc324 ~ 4 Comments

Happy New Fiscal Year!

I’m so thankful that 2020 is finally over and that we can now move on to 2021. What a year it has been! I am ready to be done with that!

Now, just as with the calendar years, I realize that not everyone celebrates the new fiscal year at the same time. This date seems to be the most prevalent, though, so I thought it was appropriate to party like its 2021 today.

In order to get 2021 off to a great start, I put together some information on the New Fiscal Year here for you, along with some additional thoughts and New Fiscal Year’s Resolutions. Continue reading “Happy New Fiscal Year!” →

Why don’t washing machines dry clothes? How did we get so many lids? And other important thoughts

~ nickc324 ~ 10 Comments

Why can’t a clothes washer and a dryer be combined into the same device? Dishwashers clean and dry the dishes. Why can’t we do this with clothes, too?

While working from home recently, I’ve had extra time to focus on important questions and thoughts such as these, so I thought I should share a few of them here with you today. You are welcome. Continue reading “Why don’t washing machines dry clothes? How did we get so many lids? And other important thoughts” →

Top 5 Tables

~ nickc324 ~ 7 Comments

I appreciate a good table.

Tables are reliable, useful and, in most instances, stable. They are also incredibly underrated.

While, chairs, beds and even bars receive most of the attention, tables come to work every day and are always there for you if you want to sit down, eat a meal, play a game, do your homework or just set down the junk mail.

Tables are amazing! Plus, there are so many of them that you use every day! I’m happy just thinking about it! At the same time, I can’t tell you how often I hear someone say, “But, Nick, what is the best type of table?” Continue reading “Top 5 Tables” →

Quarantine: A Novel Virus Novel

~ nickc324 ~ 9 Comments

Note: In an effort to make myself write more often during this quarantine, I am writing a story that involves this whole crazy situation. It will hopefully be published regularly and will hopefully be somewhat interesting.

The quarantine had been hard on all of us, most of all my stomach.

The whole world had practically shut down due to the coronavirus, and everyone was reacting to the new reality. And just when I got used to that reality, that’s when I suddenly found myself battling for my life, my planet, and my beliefs about the Oxford Comma. Continue reading “Quarantine: A Novel Virus Novel” →