I try to be an honest person, but I often find myself lying about stupid items, often for no good reason. Our judges also found these lies pointless, so they put together this list of Top 5 Items I Lie About For No Good Reason
First, a few honorable mentions:
- I Prefer To Be Busy At Work – I want to feel useful and to have plenty to do, but no one wants to be busy. Isn’t work better for everyone when there isn’t quite as much to do? Why do we lie about this?
- Telling Everyone I Am Having A Good Day – If you ask me how I am, I am going to say fine or great, even if I am sick, out of money or my head is about to fall off. (This actually relates to this column if you are interested.)
5. When Pandora Asks If I Am Still Listening – Usually, I have not been listening, but I always click Yes because I don’t want to hurt Pandora’s feelings or let the music website think I am an irresponsible listener. Often, I immediately log out after clicking yes. I know that it is stupid, but I can’t bring myself to be honest with Pandora.
4. It Was A Team Effort – I don’t really think that. Did you see that big play I just made? That was all me! Or, if I am at work, I am just thinking about how much time and effort I put into whatever we are talking about. This success was clearly due to me.
3. I Only Want One Piece of Pizza or Dessert – I always want more.
2. Telling The Pets That I Will Be Right Back When I Am Going To Work – This is stupid for several reasons. First of all, it’s doubtful that they know what I am talking about. They only listen if I am talking about food. And if they do understand me, they surely know by now that I am a big liar because I have been telling them this lie for several years. Also, maybe they like it when I’m at work and they don’t want me to come back right away anyway.
1. Writing Down Confirmation Numbers – When I am on the phone and the person or automated system tells me that the confirmation number is coming, I always pretend that I am writing it down even though I never do. Sometimes, I even ask the person to repeat a few numbers back to me just so that I sound responsible.
If you are interested in additional items that I lie about, feel free to check out this column. And if you have pointless items that you lie about, please share them below. Thanks.
Only 5??? You forgot the biggies….your height, your weight, your age, your test scores, your class ranking in school???? The list is too long but I must say, these lies were entertaining. I especially like the lie to Pandora, I think we all do that.
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Thanks! I thankfully do not remember my class ranking or test scores, so now I can just say that and I don’t even need to lie. Thanks for the suggestions, I agree with all of them!
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How about when a family member or friend calls when you are in the middle of something and they ask if they are interrupting and you say no. You want them not to be embarrassed but now your day has been shot.
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That is a really good one. It is kind of stupid, because they most likely would prefer if we just told them the truth, but it is easy to lie and say you are not doing anything. Thanks!
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I lie to the two Jehovah’s Witness ladies who now regard me as a personal friend and always seem to turn up in the middle of thunderstorms or when I’m doing the washing up. Yes, I say, of course I read your last brightly-coloured leaflet about… Jesus. Yes, of course I’d like the new one…
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That’s pretty funny, thanks! I like that they regard you as a personal friend, now.
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I am so with you on number 3. I always want more pizza or dessert.
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Thanks! I hate being polite and am usually just hungry.
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I plan for ways to go to get more pieces, too.
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#1…it’s not just about “fake listening” to the confirmation number, but when you intentionally “fake write” it down like big brother is watching…That’s when you carry the lie full out.
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I’ll even repeat back parts of the confirmation number so my lie is *even more* believable. Why? No one cares.
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It just goes along with constantly pretending to be an adult.
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I lie to make other people happy. Of course I liked your food! That shirt is super fun! Nice haircut Steven!
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I do that, too, sometimes, but I those are good reasons for the lies.
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